Thursday, 14 March 2019

My Love Story

What makes us who we are?  What are our love stories?  I ask couples to tell me their love stories so as a celebrant I can weave their story into their ceremony to make them unique and bespoke.  It also helps me to get an understanding of who they are as a couple and what makes them tick. 

Here is my love story…

 I love photo booths at weddings and this picture was taken back in 2014 and as you can see my bride and groom are holding up a sign saying ‘Still Available’.  At the time as a Marriage Celebrant in New Zealand I felt like a bit of a fraud, not only was I single but my belief in love and therefore marriage had dwindled.  Here I was marrying couples who, don’t get me wrong, were helping to restore my wounded soul with every ‘I do’, but I still felt disillusioned.

I found myself a single Mum of two beautiful girls suddenly back at home living with my folks.  And although they provided me great comfort in a desperate time, I had completely resigned myself to being on my own forever.  Frankly at the time it was all I wanted, I had definitely entered the phase of all men are horrible!  I was wounded and hurting and I had forgotten how to love or how to trust. 

I wrote a blog called ‘My Perfect Man’, a daydream really about all the things I wished for in a man; a most ridiculous wish really, a wish you would expect to find in a young girls diary.  At the time though it was therapeutic.  My luck, or rather my choice in men during my life, well, it left a lot to be desired - everything from Gay boyfriends (who I love as friends, not so much as boyfriends) to men who were emotional bullies, who strip you of everything, if you let them.

It was late 2014 when I moved to Australia with my girls and my folks.  A new start in yet another new country, perhaps true love awaited me there?  The romantic in me clung to the hope, but as time passed by and I hit 40 years old, a few kg’s more clinging to my thighs and crow’s feet emerging, that my thoughts of romance once again dwindled away. I was destined to be a lonely cat lady, just minus the cats!

I began my studies to become an Australian celebrant at this point, and although I had been working in New Zealand doing the same thing, my qualifications did not carry over. I even featured in my training college blog one week: 'A Day in the life of a Marriage Celebrant'. It was my thought that I would move into funerals, one area where my passion really did lay.  I could leave happy couples to other celebrants and not be faced everyday with the rich emotion of love that I simply couldn’t find myself.

I also joined a theatre group. I originally trained as an actress, many moons ago in London, and it was once something I loved but getting back up on the stage was going to be a challenge after 15 years.  I was instantly surrounded by the most amazing and beautiful set of people and my confidence started to return.  Then in 2016, a man walked into my life and he would be responsible for turning my world upside down.

We got a job together working as Santa and Mrs Claus for a Christmas light display in Pimpama and for 19 days straight we worked every night together laughing and talking, and I realised very early on that this man was a truly beautiful soul.  However, it wouldn’t be until Australia day the following year, during a business trip to Sydney, that we would finally start our love story together.  The first kiss told me everything I needed to know; I was, in that one moment completely and totally in love with this man, and on a path I knew there was no turning back from.  He fulfills everything I could ever want in a partner.  He is kind, considerate, he loves my girls completely and without reservation.  He’s funny, with a wicked sense of humour that matches mine and he is not afraid of showing how he feels.  He is brave, handsome and the most beautiful soul I have ever come across. Two years on we share a house together in Merrimac with my two girls, who he absolutely dotes on, and they love him as much as I do.  He spoils them rotten as he does me. 

After my poor experiences with men, I had come to believe love was something that just existed in fairy tales, or for the lucky few.  I certainly didn’t think it would ever be on the cards for me; oh how wrong I was! 

It wasn’t long before I started doing weddings again and meeting with beautiful couples and I am happy to have found my passion again.  I am excited by their stories and even more excited as I write their ceremonies and have the privilege to be part of their day. I don’t feel like a fraud anymore; I am just happy, so very happy.

The question is, who will marry me when the time comes?!

Poetry for Funerals

I am the Celebrant for a number of funerals coming up this week and I have been scouring the internet for a piece of prose suitable for an avid gardener and Dad. After many hours of searching I couldn't really find anything suitable. So decided to write a piece especially for the family.  My lovely man Craig has done a beautiful job of being my editor and presenting it for me.  I thought I might give it to the family as a keepsake.

Kate x

If you are looking for a funeral celebrant please do not hesitate to contact me.  My website is   I can also recommend a wonderful funeral directors and other services during your time of grief.